What Gordon is missing out on
by Scoop Shachtman, 25 November 2007
Here’s Fiona Phillips’ 10-point manifesto to make us great:
1 EXTRADITE Jose Mourinho from Portugal and force him to manage the England team, while boarding at my house (rent free).
2 BAN all titles, including Baroness and Duchess, and scrap the Honours system.
3 SHUT all private schools. What’s good enough for the rest of us is good enough for those who think they’re better than us. It’ll improve education for all.
4 BRING back lost childhood by raising school entry to age seven. Yes I know this’ll cause havoc for working mums and dads but, er… let me come back to you on that one.
5 BAN selection in schools - no creaming off the brightest pupils. Local schools for local people.
6 BRING back the right to be a mother by upgrading the status of stay-at-home mums. The majority of mums want to care for their pre-school children but can’t afford not to work. Maybe instead of tax allowances for childcare, cash incentives for staying at home? Er… I’ll come back to you on that one, too.
7 BAN all private medical work in NHS hospitals.
8 GET rid of contract cleaners and make Matron and nurses responsible for hospital hygiene.9 RENATIONALISE Britain’s rail network. It’s never been the same since John Major privatised British Rail, splitting it into over 100 separate companies which resulted in profits over safety and efficiency.
10 PROPER local authority care in the home for the elderly. Reinstate full home-help and meals-on-wheels services.
P.S. And, I know it’s supposed to be a 10-point plan, but none of us can rest safely in our beds until we…Take George Bush to Iraq and shoot him.
Monday 26 November 2007 at 1:23
No idea who she was; just had to go and look her up on Wikipedia. She seems mental. I might watch GMTV tomorrow to check whether she calls for the murder of any other democratically elected world leaders as I get my morning scoff.
P.S. In her column she says she was offered a Dukedom by George Osborne; I’m not sure if she’s joking or not, but isn’t that impossible and therefore potentially the tip of an iceberg of self-aggrandising bullshit?
Monday 26 November 2007 at 1:33
“No idea who she was”
This says more about you than it does her.
Monday 26 November 2007 at 8:19
What does it say? That I don’t watch GMTV?
Monday 26 November 2007 at 10:57
Will, you sound like a prick.
[Ooh goody, a sock puppet - or rather the puppet master for the trolling link whore above.]
Monday 26 November 2007 at 12:15
“What does it say? That I don’t watch GMTV?”
That you live in a biscuit tin.
Monday 26 November 2007 at 12:33
Never heard of her either. I live in a biscuit tin in london, though. i suppose there are just too many fuckwits to keep abreast of these days.
Monday 26 November 2007 at 22:15
At times I’m really confused by this site. I haven’t read enough Trotsky to call myself a Tortskyite, but from what I’ve heard I think I lean that way. I’m definitely drink-soaked… I used to love Hitchens, I just can’t wrap my mind around a war against religion. I don’t think I could ever say I was for war, but at times it is necessary.
I realize that different contributors have different viewpoints, but this is one of the few places where my sarcasm detector simply fails. And I don’t know how to react to a lot of posts on here.
And I guess this post confirms I’m a popinjay of sorts.
Monday 26 November 2007 at 22:47
Stick with it John — you’ll get there in the end.
Tuesday 27 November 2007 at 15:18
“SHUT all private schools. What’s good enough for the rest of us is good enough for those who think they’re better than us. It’ll improve education for all.”
Just a random sample I could easily take an exception to: how does she figure the education will be improved by mixing quite a few inbred twats with the general population?
(Apologies to public schools’ graduates who happen not to be inbred twats for some reason).