As the bishop said to the actress

by hakmao, 31 October 2007

strachan.jpgNormally we wouldn’t bother with a ’socialite’–who calls themself a ’socialite’ these days anyway?–allegedly involved in a ‘royal’ blackmail scandal, even if he has engaged the services of the lawyer who defended Harold Shipman, Slobodan Milošević, Saddam Hussein and Gary Glitter–now there’s a progression for you, not to mention precious column inches in the gutter press*–but then you see the photo, and think open goal.

A prime candidate to top a Charlie Brooker list of the TEN BIGGEST COCKS and SHE-COCKS in SOCIAL-CLIMBING. Considered individually, it’s not the hair, the chest, the shirt, or the tan which elevate him into this exalted category–although the glasses and the pose are both worth 100 points by themselves.

But there’s good news–he may be able to share a cell with his good mate, the posh twat otherwise known as Harry, who has attracted the attention of the constabulary over the wee matter of the untimely demise of 5% of Britain’s nesting pairs of hen harriers. Save the republican hen harriers! Give the parasite an ASBO!

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* The Torygraph reported that ’society insiders’ have ‘never heard of him’. That must sting.

Comments

  1. Dan Erdman

    Thursday 1 November 2007 at 3:39

    …he has engaged the services of the lawyer who defended Harold Shipman, Slobodan Milošević, Saddam Hussein and Gary Glitter…

    Wasn’t Gary actually on the Vietnamese or Thai version of death row for felonious kiddie-fiddling? Someone once remarked to me that, as a (then) young person listening to the Clash in 1978, 1979, he never would’ve suspected that it would one day be Joe Strummer who’d die of heart disease at a (relatively) young age and Gary friggin’ Glitter who’d be facing the firing squad.

  2. SP

    Thursday 1 November 2007 at 15:54

    ASBO nah its a straight forward criminal offence with, I think, a maximum sentence of 6 months. This would certainly be warranted, major public figures, example setting, deterrence etc. I think any reasonable probation officer would conclude a Pre Sentence Report with a recommendation of custody these as they are precisely the type of offenders for whom prison really does work. Harry on a tag also works for me. I like the “go to your bedroom you naughty boy” situation this puts the Queen in too.

    Early admissions followed by guilty pleas should secure a fine though which I’m sure they would prefer to a community penalty.

    Wonder if they have heard this by emo outfit MCR

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=LkgbNpdR4HQ